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I haven't had sex in eight months. To be ho

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I haven't had sex in eight months. To be honest, I now prefer to go bowling.

You don't have to be a beer drinker to play darts,

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You don't have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps.

'Tis all a chequer board of nights and days,

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'Tis all a chequer board of nights and days,
Where destiny with men for pieces plays;
Hither and thither, and mates, and slays.

One of the advantages bowling has over golf is th

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One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball.

Cards are war, in disguise of a sport.

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Cards are war, in disguise of a sport.

Life's too short for chess.

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Life's too short for chess.

The bowling alley is the poor man's country club.

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The bowling alley is the poor man's country club.

Chess is a foolish expedient for making idle peop

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Chess is a foolish expedient for making idle people believe they are doing something very clever when they are only wasting their time.

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven b

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It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.

With spots quadrangular of diamond form, Ensa

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With spots quadrangular of diamond form,
Ensanguined hearts, clubs typical of strife,
And spades, the emblems of untimely graves.

Whoever called snooker chess with balls

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Whoever called snooker chess with balls was rude, but right.

Chess is a sea in which a gnat may drink and an e

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Chess is a sea in which a gnat may drink and an elephant may bathe.

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