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In order to become the master, the politician pos

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In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant.

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote aga

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Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

Those who are too smart to engage in politics are

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Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.

We'd all like to vote for the best man, but he's

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We'd all like to vote for the best man, but he's never a candidate.

An election is coming. Universal peace is d

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An election is coming. Universal peace is declared and the foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry.

A conservative is a man with two perfectly good l

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A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward.

All of us who are concerned for peace and triumph

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All of us who are concerned for peace and triumph of reason and justice must be keenly aware how small an influence reason and honest good will exert upon events in the political field.

We live in a world in which politics has replaced

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We live in a world in which politics has replaced philosophy.

I think it's about time we voted for senators wit

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I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs long enough.

Take our politicians: they're a bunch of yo

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Take our politicians: they're a bunch of yo-yos. The presidency is now a cross between a popularity contest and a high school debate, with an encyclopedia of cliches the first prize.

Truth is not determined by majority vote.

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Truth is not determined by majority vote.

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could be

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When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.

What is conservatism? Is it not the adheren

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What is conservatism? Is it not the adherence to the old and tried against the new and untried?

Under democracy one party always devotes its chie

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Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, findi

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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.

The modern conservative is engaged in one of man'

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The modern conservative is engaged in one of man's oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.

We have, I fear, confused power with greatness.

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We have, I fear, confused power with greatness.

A liberal is a man or a woman or a child who look

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A liberal is a man or a woman or a child who looks forward to a better day, a more tranquil night, and a bright, infinite future.

Politicians are the same all over. They pro

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Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where they is no river.

Politicians are like diapers. They both nee

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Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.

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