Middle age: When you're sitting at home on
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Middle age: When you're sitting at home on Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.
Life is like a blanket too short. You pull
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Life is like a blanket too short. You pull it up and your toes rebel, you yank it down and shivers meander about your shoulder; but cheerful folks manage to draw their knees up and pass a very comfortable night.
Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage.
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Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage. Lettuce pray.
Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.
There are two things in life that a sage must pre
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There are two things in life that a sage must preserve at every sacrifice, the coats of his stomach and the enamel of his teeth. Some evils admit of consolations, but there are no comforters for dyspepsia and the toothache.
Nations grown corrupt
Love bondage more than
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Nations grown corrupt
Love bondage more than liberty;
Bondage with ease than strenuous liberty.
Marriage, n. A community consisting of a ma
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Marriage, n. A community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all two.
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibio
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.
There was no respect for youth when I was young, a
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There was no respect for youth when I was young, and now that I am old, there is no respect for age - I missed it coming and going.
True courage is not the brutal force of vulgar he
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True courage is not the brutal force of vulgar heroes, but the firm resolve of virtue and reason.
What a distressing contrast there is between the
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What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult.
How can a society that exists on instant mashed p
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How can a society that exists on instant mashed potatoes, packaged cake mixes, frozen dinners, and instant cameras teach patience to its young?
In an age like ours, which is not given to letter
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In an age like ours, which is not given to letter-writing, we forget what an important part it used to play in people's lives.
If... the machine of government... is of such a n
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If... the machine of government... is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law.
Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in payi
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Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those to whom they entrust the minds of their children a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom they entrust the care of their plumbing.
Every child comes with the message that God is no
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Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man.
Courage is never to let your actions be influence
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Courage is never to let your actions be influenced by your fears.
When a man throws an empty cigarette package from
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When a man throws an empty cigarette package from an automobile, he is liable to a fine of $50. When a man throws a billboard across a view, he is richly rewarded.
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