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The essence of mathematics is not to make simple

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The essence of mathematics is not to make simple things complicated, but to make complicated things simple.

Children are natural mimics who act like their pa

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Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

A lot of history is just dirty politics cleaned u

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A lot of history is just dirty politics cleaned up for the consumption of children and other innocents.

We live in a world in which politics has replaced

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We live in a world in which politics has replaced philosophy.

We hope that, when the insects take over the worl

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We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.

Those who are too smart to engage in politics are

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Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the m

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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of another boy.

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamppost

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He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lampposts - for support rather than for illumination.

May it please Heaven that his example shall conti

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May it please Heaven that his example shall continue to serve as a beacon to our Republics in their darkest moments of doubt and adversity.

The important thing today is not what we say of L

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The important thing today is not what we say of Lincoln but what Lincoln would say of us if he were here in this hour and could note the drift and tendency in American life and American politics.

A biophysicist talks physics to the biologists an

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A biophysicist talks physics to the biologists and biology to the physicists, but then he meets another biophysicist, they just discuss women.

One more fagot of these adamantine bandages is th

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One more fagot of these adamantine bandages is the new science of Statistics.

I always find that statistics are hard to swallow

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I always find that statistics are hard to swallow and impossible to digest. The only one I can ever remember is that if all the people who go to sleep in church were laid end to end they would be a lot more comfortable.

Children have more need of models than of critics

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Children have more need of models than of critics.

Go down deep enough into anything and you will fi

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Go down deep enough into anything and you will find mathematics.

Statistics can be made to prove anything - even t

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Statistics can be made to prove anything - even the truth.

Do not... regard the critics as questionable patr

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Do not... regard the critics as questionable patriots. What were Washington and Jefferson and Adams but profound critics of the colonial status quo?

The word aerobics came about when the gym instruc

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The word aerobics came about when the gym instructors got together and said, If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it jumping up and down.

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