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A machine has value only as it produces more than

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A machine has value only as it produces more than it consumes - so check your value to the community.

Luck is the by-product of busting your fanny.

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Luck is the by-product of busting your fanny.

It used to be that people needed products to surv

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It used to be that people needed products to survive. Now products need people to survive.

Most sermons sound to me like commercials - but I

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Most sermons sound to me like commercials - but I can't make out whether God is the Sponsor or the Product.

Ignorance is a right! Education is eroding

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Ignorance is a right! Education is eroding one of the few democratic freedoms remaining to us.

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able t

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Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway.

Let him who looks for a monument to Washington l

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Let him who looks for a monument to Washington look around the United States. Your freedom, your independence, your national power, your prosperity, and your prodigious growth are a monument to him.

We would frequently be ashamed of our good deeds

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We would frequently be ashamed of our good deeds if people saw all of the motives that produced them.

It is difficult to produce a television documenta

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It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the scho

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Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

It is not the employer who pays the wages.

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It is not the employer who pays the wages. He only handles the money. It is the product that pays the wages.

We have produced a world of contented bodies and

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We have produced a world of contented bodies and discontented minds.

It is difficult not to wonder whether that combin

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It is difficult not to wonder whether that combination of elements which produces a machine for labor does not create also a soul of sorts, a dull resentful metallic will, which can rebel at times.

In gardens, beauty is a by-product. The mai

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In gardens, beauty is a by-product. The main business is sex and death.

Finland has produced so many brilliant distance r

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Finland has produced so many brilliant distance runners because back home it costs $2.50 a gallon for gas.

For women the best aphrodisiacs are words.

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For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time.

Education... has produced a vast population able

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Education... has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading.

To wash one's hair, make one's toilet, and put on

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To wash one's hair, make one's toilet, and put on scented robes; even if not a soul sees one, these preparations still produce an inner pleasure.

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